f... f.... football. If it doesn't have an engine, forget about it!
The final Grand Prix of the 2008 season spawned drama even before the warm-up lap. As the cars sat on the grid, rain unceremoniously dumped water all over Interlagos. Given ten minutes delay to change the setup and tyres - limited to what they could do on the grid, teams changed wings, fitted intermediate tyres and told drivers to stay calm and not to race too hard into the first bend.
In 2006, Rossi's injuries allowed Haydon to sneak through and win the Championship; in 2007 no one could touch Stoner. This year, Rossi has won, on merit but with a little help from Stoner's injuries. The last race of the season in Valencia proved a cracker as Stoner made it clear: his tiny hand is broken but his heart and his ambition are as big as ever.
It was thrilling Boys' Own stuff. In the red, white and blue corner, the little team from the UK led by Richard Noble with a car powered by a jet engine and driven by a fighter pilot Andy Green. In the corner with the stars and stripes, a hugely funded American team. The prize? To be the first to break the sound barrier on land.
Sometimes it takes you by surprise: its the article you always wished you coud write, and someone else writes it. Kudos, Kathy Marks and The Independent.
It emerged recently that McLaren have not yet signed a renewal deal with Santander to continue the major sponsorship deal that has put them onto millions of TV screens around the world, although the deal is said to be in place for 2009. But there are darker issues at work - and it's not just McLaren who need to be worried about funding.
Ferrari will come up with all sorts of excuses - something broke on Raikkenon's car, he was dehyrdated and not feeling well, the telemetry showed that he may have had a puncture. Whatever it was, suddenly the Finn's Ferrari was a lot slower than his team-mate as they swapped places to keep Massa's title chances one point more hopeful.
It's hot in Sepang today: 42 degrees on the track. But Valentino Rossi takes his ninth win of the 2008 season, and his fifth Malaysian GP title with a performance so cool, it's chilling for his rivals.
There will be some nervousness at the Force India factory as Prime Sponsor Kingfisher's airline business sees substantial losses - and several other sponsors are in business areas that will be at the coal face if there is a recession.
The increasing inconsistency of stewards decisions in F1 is turning the sport into a total farce. And as usual Ferrari benefits and McLaren - and other teams - suffer.